Not only do I have mixed emotions right now but I have LOTS of them. So bear with me....
If you know me you know I love my kiddos. Like REALLY love them. I also really LIKE them. They are fantastically amazing human beings that bring beauty and joy to this world but especially to me.
I know it's a natural mothering reaction to want to kill anyone that hurts our babies. It's simply the mama bear, mama lion, whatever you want to call it instinct. If you are a mother you are nodding your head right about now because you know. And if you have ever witnessed it, I hope it wasn't on the receiving end. What you all may not know is that - at least for me - this instinct goes both ways. Meaning, when someone is kind and loving towards one of my babies my heart melts and I have an instinctual love for them. (usually)
I could make a list of the humans that have been on the receiving end of this mama bear love, and I just may do that someday. But today I am thinking about a couple of dear souls that entered my Sara's life about a year ago.
This could become a big or little box story (only my kids will get that) so I will try to not make this too long of a story.
Sara started a new job and after her first day of training I asked her if she made any friends. She said that this gorgeous girl walked into class and Sara was sure they would either be best friends or enemies. (most women will understand that feeling) I don't recall if it was that same day but very soon Sara said something like "I found out she is a lesbian so there is no competition issue so we are going to be best friends." Sara soon met Jess's fiance, Jamie, who also worked there and they all became fast friends.
Cut to the controversial stuff---- I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I believe that marriage is a sacred union between a man and a woman. And I believe that same sex attraction is a challenge for all involved. I do not believe that the attraction is a sin but acting on it is because I do believe that sexual relations outside of marriage is a sin. THAT BEING SAID.... I have sinned. In more ways than just this. And I know my neighbor has in some form or another. And my family all has. We are not on this earth to be perfect, but we are supposed to try. But we are a world full of sinners. Period. And it is not my place to judge what should happen to any of us that sin. What it boils down to for me is this... I thank heavens that I don't have to agree with everything a person says, does, or believes in order to LOVE them. If I did, I would have a very lonely life.
I have quite a few gay and lesbian friends. People that I sincerely love and choose to have in my life. I could be wrong but I don't think anything I say here will come as a surprise to any of them. I'm not generally known as someone that keeps my feelings to myself.
And let me address this concept. I am a "good" Mormon. That discussion gets thrown about a lot. "But you're not a 'good" Mormon, Shelly." Yep. I am. Garment clad. Temple recommend holding. I am what would be considered "good" by any standard. Sadly what usually comes next is "Ok... but you aren't one of 'those' Mormons." When I dared to ask what "those" Mormons are I was told... judgmental. Hateful. Just all kinds of shades of judgey. Ok... you are right. I am not one of THOSE. But neither are a whole lot of the rest of 'them". This is sincerely a situation where a few rotten apples have spoiled the bunch. But I am not hear to speak for the bunch. That isn't my place. I will direct you to check the website www.lds.org for the OFFICIAL stance on this and other issues. If individual members of the Church choose to interpret or live differently, it is their life to live.
This brings me to a HOT topic I may address more fully at another time. Same sex marriage.
Cut back to Jess and Jamie. These girls love my daughter and bring happiness to her life. So guess what? I LOVE THEM. And that means I hope they are happy. (Refer back to my comment about not needing to agree with a person's choices in order to love them)
Jess and Jamie are not the couple I taught my children about when I taught them about temple marriage. But they have taught my children something. They have shown us all a great example of love. And so when they were married this past weekend, we were there to celebrate with them. We cried when Jess walked down the aisle. We cried during their first dance. (Ok...Hunter didn't... but us girls were BAWLING) We brought a gift. We danced with them at the reception. And we congratulated them with hugs and kisses. Because we love them. Period. It's really simple actually.
I made the choice several weeks ago to not post photos and make a big deal of this 'good' Mormon lady attending a same sex wedding because it wasn't about me. It was their time. And I knew that I'd have comments. I knew it would become something I didn't want it to be.
I awoke this morning to news about the court's ruling, or lack thereof, which means that the legal part of Jess and Jamie's union is just that. Legal. So there are the mixed emotions. I am happy for them. Period. Does it change my own belief about same sex marriages. Nope. And I am happy to explain that to anyone that doesn't get it. And perhaps write about it at a future date. But today I am grateful that the maid of honor Sara gets a chance to rest. And hope that my extra daughters Jess & Jamie are thoroughly enjoying their honeymoon.
We would all be lucky to find love like theirs.
My favorite thing in this post will be some of my favorite moments from the wedding.
